Joice Joker’s Blog is !!! MOVING !!!

Yes, it’s true: I got a bigger place for us to play! 


This is the new playground:


So come on over and join in on the adventure. 
It’s transformational, fun and…..ahem…a bit kinky!

But my guess is: You already knew that. 😉




Woman – Successful, Intelligent, Sexy – seeking Romance

You knew it the moment you saw him. He was smart, handsome, a laid back guy, who wears his clothes a bit rebellious. And it hit you. It hit him just the same.
You got together. It was heaven. So easy going. So free.
And then….

Then it fell apart. You found out he wasn’t right for you. You lost your trust in him. The respect above all. He wasn’t strong enough, reliable enough, manly enough.
And on top of that you find out that your friends have the same problem with men: They are just not stepping up. These bastards. *smirks*

In the corporate world us women have many things to deal with. We have to step up to make things happen. Oh yes, we are great at it, beating even men out of competition, showing them all, that we can be better. And ladies, don’t we get a high from it? It just feels so good to be in power, to have everything under control. We fly high. Endlessly high.

And it just so happens that men are intimidated by our power, our demeanor, the command we hold tightly in our hands. The sophistication that describes how far up we are on the latter of success.

But is that actually true? Are these men really intimidated?
Having spoken to numerous men in the corporate world, as powerful or even more successful than we are, it came to find out that this fantasy might be a hallucination we have allowed ourselves to fly high on. Men respect successful women. BUT – they are unwilling to have headbutting in their relationships, a constant struggle over power with the woman they love. Those very successful men expressed their desire to have a complimentary partner, as to an opposing one. To have a woman by their side as their greatest partner in all things. These men crave women who know how to be honest without flashing fangs and cutting claws. Yes, we can tear men apart. Emasculate them at the mere sight. One look says it all. No matter how beautiful we smile. The intent to kill (not for fun this time) is written in large neon letters onto our foreheads. In business and in love life.
Doesn’t that seem a bit…

Our businesses are so charged with this highly pumped up adrenaline, that we can’t even come down from it, not even when we step outside of our offices, into our homes. Well, at least not when HE is around. Or is that a lie we’ve been telling ourselves as well? Perhaps we are unable to let this high go, even when we are alone, just by ourselves?

Our expectations of ourselves are high, just like the level of adrenaline pumping through our veins. Yes, we are tired, our bodies relax a bit when we enter the bedroom, in which our silk linen awaits us patiently. We slide into the bed, perfectly relaxed. But our mind keeps rattling an rambling on about what we are missing.

And so our mind keeps nagging about the missing part in your lives- a real man by our side. Someone who can step up to have us feel a bit taken care of. Wouldn’t that be a relief from all of the things you are confronted with all day? Wouldn’t it be a good thing to have a man by your side to hold you when you’re sad? Or angry? Or just plain bitchy because you’re running through your monthly cycle? A man who truly understands you? As a woman in the corporate world? With all of your responsibilities? The upsides and the downsides of it? And the emotions that come along with being a woman? What about if this man could take your storms and prosper in them? How would it feel to be accepted by your counter part? Fully loved. In your entire being.

We often wonder if that kind of man even exists. At least in our lives. And even more times we wonder why those great men, we admire, go for women so weak and pitiful? They appear so fragile and lost, that you wonder what it is about them? Well, his loss! If he can’t see how great you are, then he doesn’t deserve you in the first place. But it still hurts like hell, doesn’t it? Feels like being stabbed or strangled, suffocated or burned.

But here’s one tiny step to take today to make it into his direction, into your direction to be exact.

How would it be if you would truly acknowledge what you want as a woman? From men? From yourself? What is that burning desire inside of you? The one that leaves you restless, disappointed, hungry?

Find this longing. Call it out. Just be aware – it’s in pain. This longing doesn’t have many chances to come out and play. Give it a voice. Make it clear that this craving is accepted, even loved. And that it is loved by no other but you. For this longing is a part of you. And why would you want to resist a part of your own self? To wonder around, split in half. Torn apart by a pain that doesn’t feel good at all.
Remember, what you resist persists.
So, if you like continue to push it aside, back into the dungeon where you once locked it in, that’s fine. Just remember that this look, this alliance with yourself can give you insights which cannot be obtained by looking the other way. By running from the pain that will come along with this. Deep down in your gut you might even feel that you can do this. With or without me.

You are one brave woman.
How I can tell?
You finished reading this article to the end. You might have felt what it means to pay heed to this part of you, now with the new knowledge you have gained.

You can do this.
I believe in you.

~ Joice Joker

When the Healer Emerges

We can find plenty of archetypes within us. Some are magicians, warriors, queens and lovers. In today’s times everything is about competition, about booting out the next man, the next woman. We wear our mascara like daggers, our lipstick like poison and high heels to frighten and to spread terror. And whoa! Those archetypes certainly do a great job with that, don’t they?
Yes, their shadows do. And what about the light side of them?
Even if they did function in their sovereign purpose, there is something missing here, isn’t there?
What is it?

Are we ready to receive all of the above while being wounded, bleeding from our hearts, our souls, our sex?

Let me tell you the story of how it came to pass that a healer surfaced, a healer of hearts, of souls. Through ecstatic orgasm beyond bliss.

It was late at night. David and I felt that it would kill us both if we agreed to a legal bond, being captivated within a system’s machinery. We stand for healing, for freedom. Ultimate freedom to allow ourselves to be ourselves. Sure, we would always stand out as leaders of a whole different kind of sexual revolution. One that heals.

But how could I possibly walk my path with him leaving soon, without the capability to heal myself? This wasn’t about the so praised female independence. This was much, much deeper. It had nothing to do with personality. But rather with who I am as a woman. As a living soul. If what I am would wound me this deeply, how could I recover from it after all?

Enclosed we laid in the bed, holding each other. If I was about to lose this….it was pure terror to even finish the thought. I’d given up everything for him. Literally. My heart, my soul, my sex, my life. Was this a bad thing? I feel only pure love when thinking that this was the best I have ever done. A deep sadness holds me when I think about how it didn’t work out the way we hoped it did. So now what? I was wounded. So deeply that I thought I’d die.

And then she emerged. While we went through my persona, what they felt, how they changed, she appeared, in orgasmic healing. Waves clashed over me, gushed through my body as she grew stronger. And I healed. With each orgasm. More healing. More ecstasy. More of everything. More connection with him. Feeding off this energy, my soul turned whole again, my heart beat, for me and him and everyone else who would come into my circles. As a lover, a friend, a coaching client or a quite observer…

“I saw her long before you realized she was there.”
Yes, he most likely did. I was so busy with my own issues that I didn’t take the time to notice. And yet, I recall her being there stronger than ever before, in a session I recently had, with a friend very close to my heart. Her suffering called for the healer’s presence. I noticed and have her to take control. It was the best session I ever had. My own vulnerability was key. To be true to my own emotions and to give permission for another to do so.

Patience. Heart. Tears. Sharing those intense emotions. Allowing them to surface. To have a voice. And knowing about the wonders of time and it’s power over the healing process.

The Healer.
She is light and dark. All the same. She guides into transformation and cuts where it’s needed, to encourage the pain to rise from the darkness of the chasm. To be acknowledged. To be heard and loved. To heal and to transform. Into love and compassion. Into pure life and ecstasy. Into orgasms beyond the boundaries of bliss.

Into freedom. Into true independence. It’s called interdependence. The healer knows that through interaction with others, we grow and heal. Separation destroys the healing process, cutting ourselves off from the flow of life. From the loving compassion of those who surround us. From the collective, we, as human beings, thrive on. A wondrous, sharing, all connecting wave of pleasure and pain, of love and ecstasy, of nurturing and healing, surrounding each and every one of us and connecting us even in our pain, in the suffering we feel.

The healer is only one aspect of me. And how much of an impact it had on the others…

The amazon protects. With more fluidity. Her shields become flexible, acknowledging of those who need another aspect of me during their search for their own truth. Her shadow, the assassin sees more opportunity for release of negative influences. What a change! So marvelous!

The artist colors with more compassion, with a flick of her wrist she guides into brighter worlds beyond imagination. She creates the atmosphere in which freedom is allowed. In which self discovery is the highest virtue.
And ecstasy, of course.
Painting with feathers,
painting with stripes of leather,
With taste and smell,
With sounds and visuals,
with silk and sweat and…
In the endless colors of imagination.

The seductress found her piece with herself.
Luring. Yes.
Play. Yes.
Oh yes, please!
And most of all – no more self deception. The seductress of all other persona is yet still a mystery to behold. She does not know of what takes her down this path. But she feels it. There are no words, except those with which she lures and seduces, through which she is lured and seduced.
Her song is that of the Siren.
Irrationally passionate.

Oh but there is one more. The empress. Her reign over her world is now full of wisdom sprouting from her scepter. Her rule is that of love and possibility. The aim: to give everyone what they need and deserve. Strategies? What other strategy could there possibly be other than that of flow? To encourage everyone to live up fully to who they are and what they stand for? Hardness has left. There is no more place for this in her realm. What a treasure this healer is to everyone!

I might find myself in utter confusion from time to time until it fully holds sway over me in it’s wholeness. I fully and willingly surrender to it. This is my healing through ecstasy. I wonder how I would have gotten there without having the gift of sensual relief, of knowing where my power is…

“Should you take off your relationship status on facebook?”
After all of the persuasion it took him to have me put it up there for the world to see, he now wanted me to take it down? What did that mean? That everything is over? Even the will to make it work regardless of everything? My mind went nuts. If I dissociated from him like this it would be over for sure. Words have such a power over me that I cannot refuse them. In the long run.

My excuse: “Then I’ll have all of those guys on my back again….”. “Ahh, yes.”
I’m still a bit clueless as to what it means to take my status down. To me. I just felt a strong disconnect the moment I would take it down. Just the thought of it. It took me such strength to actually put it up. And now it would take much more than that to take it back down. I know it’s silly to fret over something this trivial. But to me it’s not. It means more than I could ever describe…

“What does that even mean?”
“It means ‘good bye for now’. And only when you’re ready to let me go.”

Now what? Will I do it now? No. Then I will destroy the bond while he’s here. That’s not going to happen.

When he will be out of this place I will take it down. There is no use in holding on to something that once meant a beginning. Taking it down is the continuation of all of this. A transformation.

Suddenly I can welcome it with open arms. Although a deep sadness grips me every now and then, the Healer smiles, even down between my thighs. And it continues throughout my body until my lips do the same. Smile.

Because we are free!

~Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

The Freedom To Be You

‘Be yourself.’
‘Be true to yourself.’
Trust your gut instinct.’

How many times do we hear those words and how many times do we discard them by ignoring the whisper deep down in our core? That something isn’t right about a situation. That there must be another way or we will sell ourselves, our souls. For something that, in exchange will destroy everything we have found. The love, the freedom within.

Letting go can be the hardest part of it all. You will hear about a few circumstances I am recently facing, describing exactly what it means to live in your core and to listen to that whisper that stems from it.


Something was brewing the whole time. From his arrival up to last night we experienced such incredible growth, that by looking back, it seems to have shifted the world inside of us into a reality we both always wanted: To be free to be us and to follow our vision no matter what.

As I am sitting here, it is a few minutes after 9am and my mind goes nuts. David is out to fetch a few things and I have the apartment all to myself. It feels good to be alone right now. And yet it feels like he is gone already.

Against all decisions of security, David and I have decided not to get married. We never wanted to in the first place. We saw it a means to stay together. Through this unreal commitment of a legal marriage, we also felt the heavy burden on our shoulders and how it began to tear on our souls. Unhappiness spread like cancer through our days. It was ridiculously tough to feel free with the decision to agree to a legal bond in which we’d lose our power, who we are and what we stand for.

We already got married a while back – the shaman way. With candle lights and words of radical honesty, we whispered our promises into each others ears. Naked on the bed with the wish to re-frame what marriage means to us, only us, we locked eyes and exchanged what we felt was right. For each of us in this bond of hearts.

We were relieved to know that we have each other in this space we created for us. That we wouldn’t tie each other down, other than for pleasure purposes. That we would always honor who we are and what our personal mission is. The core of each of us stood as a token, even of what we feel for each other. Our mission merged, the focus, the love, the growth into who we want to become was strong. So strong that it feels it could tear the world apart. And all along change it for the better.

As you might already know, David came from Australia to Germany to be with me. Soon his visa will run out and with the business just starting off we have no means to support our relationship the way it is required by German law. I cannot move anywhere outside of the country due to a court case that requires for me to stay here. At least for now.

So now we’ll have to find another way to make our liaison stay true. He will leave in a few weeks. And then….
We have in mind for him to return. We will see if that works out in our favor. Hopefully it does.

We both feel that this is the right thing to do, and yet we fear that we won’t find back together after a prolonged time span of separation. When we first began to speak online, it only took us a month to decide that this is what we wanted.
To be together.

Little did we know that everything we did in order to obey the law and simultaneously wanting to live what we believe in, couldn’t work out. It just couldn’t. Papers over papers were needed to get married. It had to be approved by a German instance and then we might be able to get married. When I look back right now, it all appears a big joke. No kidding.

We knew it wouldn’t work with all of the resistance we had against getting married. Why would we even complain that the world had turned against us?
How could we be so blind to see, that getting married under legal force is not what we stand for, is not in alignment with who we are in our core? As I write these lines, this wisdom pours through me like a never ending river of truth. Our truth.
It hurts, yes. A pain beyond description. And on the other side lies freedom beyond measure. Freedom to allow ourselves to be ourselves. The freedom to chose what is right for the both of us with everything it entails.

We honor our birthrights to be free in our souls, our minds, our sex.
The thought of it alone creates such lust within me, it is hard to describe. Yes, there is fear. Plenty of it. And there is courage. Even more of that. It is something that has to be done. So that we can indeed be free.

We promised ourselves to give us the emotional closure we need in order to make our relationship work in our favor. Over the distance. Around the globe. With that shining core of each of us.

There is endless love in our freedom versus our neediness. And thus I trust, that whatever will come our way, we will be magnificent. It just feels right. And free.

What else can I possibly say?

~ Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex. And yes, they will continue to work with women, regardless.

Check out their Facebook pages:

Illusion & Reality – Somewhat A Thesis

As we all have our dreams of fulfillment, of truthfulness, rawness, ecstasy, we also have what I call ‘The Thesis Of Reality’. In this reality we dare to follow our dreams by allowing influences to overwhelm us. By accepting that only through physical action, that specific thesis turns to reality.

What will always accompany us is our fear. That’s great. Because without fear we wouldn’t even know what it means to be courageous. Or as I love to put it ‘Fear is the Stimulus for Courage’.

So what is an illusion?
An illusion consists of a dream that is a construct of our mind and never will be lived. It exists out of the mere necessity to comfort our minds into a state of resignation. We can grab that dream and it feels real in that moment, doesn’t it?
But what happens when we don’t follow that dream, that one thing, our souls cry out for in the face of daily torment? Through our ignorance to make it possible?
What happens if we don’t follow what calls us, what defines who we are as women? Who you are, as a woman?

And what’s reality then?
Reality is what you have in your head and actually live to fulfill it. Every day. 24/7. Even in your sleep. You live for it, breathe for it, sweat for it and orgasm through it.
Your reality is your purpose, your reason to live.
So what is it that you live for?
How would you like to be remembered?
How would you like to be?
Which developments do you want in your life?
And what are you doing for it today?

Every day we ask ourselves under layers and layers of busy-ness and personality:
‘How can I reach my bliss, the high I so crave?’
‘What fills me up, what fulfills me?’

And every day we are scared to go beyond our limits, to take that leap of faith into the dark where there is nothing, absolutely nothing to hold on to. Only your reality. And your belief that you will make it through that dark space until the light emerges again. And it always does, doesn’t it?
How did you make it through the hardships of your life?
When you look back, was it ever as bad as you imagined it to be?

The human psyche is a monster. It tells us all of these fucked up stories and how badly we will get hurt. But when we go for what we want, even that monster will run. Run for the hills. How would it feel to live with lesser doubts, lesser concerns and worries about how something might turn out? Do we know? In advance?

Yeah, we know. And we know because we are listening to either one of the parts within us. The light or the shadow. And depending upon which one we are listening to, that will be our outcome.

So the next time you read a juicy article, an intriguing poem and have the time of your mind, going upside down from hormone overdose, which side will you listen to? To your womb, which screams for more pleasure, more love, more of everything, for something like this to happen to you? Or will you go to your head, the liar, that tells you it can’t be possibly done and has you scared out of your senses over getting your expectations disappointed?

Which one will liberate you?
Which one will make you happy?
And which voice is your reality?

Choose wisely, my love.

And now live it.
I am with you.

~ Joice Joker

Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

Up To No Good…

So many wicked thoughts…..where do I begin to live them?
A mischievous smile flings over the face, than it vanishes into
played innocence. A sense for adventure, to go beyond limits,
to break rules flushes the system.

This twitching and itching from head to toe…
Obnoxious irritation.
So undeniably delicious,
sweet to the nervous system,
exiting to the spirit.

The death of one situation to the rise of another,
a multitude of outrageous impressions entering the mind.
The want to give in to them – so strong.

With the flick of a wrist, tender feet emerge from veiling, soft flowing
fabric that covered them.  Oh, that wasn’t intended . . .

Liquid like textile streams down onto the floor,
the thighs revealed shine with excitement.
Well, then…

Those penetrating gazes from across the room feel like there’s nothing to
be hidden from them. They will absorbingly discover every tiny movement, every detail of revealed skin, the smallest twist of emotional change. Violent hunger for every faint detail in exchange for the lust of revealing in awkwardness that which is not to be uncovered.

Whispers. Murmurs.

More eyes are fixated on the exorbitant mocking of light flesh. Oh, that little sting of exhibitionism. How well it plays into the voyeuristic observation of attentive eyes. And how well it plays into the gasps of those who would not dare to surrender of any, any thought of . . . well – daring?

Long lashes sink down slowly only to rise up slowly as if they are heavily laden with laziness, like the eyes are asking for permission to stay closed, to linger within the non-existent boundaries of the darkness behind the lids.

The necklace, more a tool for bondage, glides through skilled hands, playfully exploring every bead, every pendant, every link of that endlessly long chain accommodating a nesting for ravishing colors and shapes, the slow smooth movements of every dome lapsing from one elegant finger to the next, extending into dark red nails, movements, which lure those who watch into oblivion. And again the eyes wander down the necklace, with the sole purpose to find it striking along smooth thighs. What a sight, what a feeling. Exhilaration takes over and tempts into further tempting those eyes, which are capable to remote control vocal cords, hands and body. Along the lines of disclosure runs the inherent threat to provoke utmost violence. Yes.

To leave the desire unfulfilled gives such pleasure, the assurance that by removing the object of desire it evokes even more of such. More pain, more pleasure. When the fabric is being moved over those pale long legs again, the forlorn sensible pain of those for whom those tools of enticement are now unseen is irrevocably intimidating. The stares become more intense as if they could melt away the clothing that hides the treasure underneath.

A threat roams through the air, alarmingly intimidating,

The desired effect is created. It is time to leave. One smoldering look over the shoulder and out of the door. The fresh air rips the soul into another reality. Some deep breaths. That was close. A smile carves it’s way from one side of the face to the other. Utter disturbance was the goal. And was it not created?

Red high heels make a clicking sound each time they hit the pavement of the sidewalk along a lively main street, away from the scene of crime.

To get away with such provocation is a skill, it takes timing and language. It was mastered tonight. How many more times was it possible to get away with it? We shall see . . .

~ Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

More than 7+1 Ways to Get Claimed

One thing is clear, this isn’t the regular, standardized way of pursuing an intimate relationship. And these are only a few components of what it takes to have a fiery, a burning inside of you for each other. But first I invite you to feel, to drop into that space and feel the grip, the tenderness, the intensity of it all. EnJoy!

1. Gentleness. You crave it, want it. Allowing the sweetness, the ethereal seduction to penetrate your mind, your spirit. Let it hold you and caress you. Through words of enchantment. Through a faint touch of your soul. Those words, so much more. A gateway to freedom. A gateway to feel alive. And to cum.

2. Melting. He touches you with care, confident, unyielding. In his might he does not waver nor back away. What a delight to fall into those strong arms. What a miracle to have the strength to give in, to let it happen.

3. Surprisingly captured. His firm grip. Your flailing hips and hair and ohhh…. penetration. The backward pull. The suddenness. Loosing ground. But wait, he holds you. Safe. An earth shaking shutter. The touch inside. Deliciously violent. Your surrender to the inevitable. And your reward.

4. Slowly. Solid. A slight pain from his touch. Wrists pressed into the surface beneath. Mighty thrusts. Ever so slowly. His eyes holding you in place. More than anything else. A breath. A moan. Thighs swing wide open. So shameless. So free. Just you in a moment of ticklish thundering silence interrupted by sharp breaths.

5. Torturing. The sharp fierceness of biting nails down your ribs. Burning streaks of lust. His merciless grips around your waist. Your futile attempts to escape. No such thing. Somebody help.

6. Raw. Bare. This calling from deep within underneath of layers and layers of personality. Instinctive. Irrational. Just there. Waiting to be unleashed. To burn everything that touches it. The flame of being. Just that.

7. With a Heart. A thoroughness soaring through mind, soul and body. The warmth seeping into your heart, between your thighs. All of it in one moment of connecting, locking eyes, feeling. Uncovered emotion under a rim of thick lashes. Ecstasy. What else…

So what is it that you can do to receive this treatment? How will he even recognize that it’s you he wants to ravish? More than 7+1 Ways to Get Claimed shows you the way…

+1. Welcome. Oh, the intensity of his persona. Nothing can stop him from ravishing you. Nothing. You welcome him and there will be nothing he will want more than you. Nothing.

+2. Flow. This easiness gliding through your body and your mind like water flows. A rush. A willingness to move with what is given to you. His lips on yours. Acceptance. Love. Fever. There’s nothing else like it.

+3. Expression. Hips scorch, they twist and twine. Your lust in your bodies movement. A confession to his senses, empowerment in the sweetest language. Show yourself. Openly. As a woman who knows what she speaks of. And he will love you for it.

+4. Honesty. Your unfeigned honesty. The truth you hold with every breath you take, with every drop of sweat, every tear, every laughter, every cry and every anger. During orgasm or after. That truth, your truth, the most precious gem to give. To yourself. To him, who conquered the wild, untamed feminine.

+5. Openness. Just a little for now. Enough to plant his voice into your ear, enough to have you think of him day and night. The slightly opened gate to your soul. A whisper. A touch. Slightly. Yet powerful. And your mind goes crazy over the promise he makes, over the ecstasy at hand if you would only open. A little more. And a little more. And he will pursue that what is still hidden behind the gate, the wall, the fortress. To find the treasure in you. Your essence. Bare and uncovered.

+6. Grace. Your air. An elegance he can’t resist, nor withstand nor deny.

+7. Tenderness. A light touch, compassionate yet sensual. His drive to dissolve into you, to step into a woman who can make him feel like that. Wanted, loved, appreciated and worshiped.

+8. Mystery. Cultivate your secret. Oh, the air around you, the scent of an unknown world behind your eyes. Which man can deny the gravity of the unknown, the unique, the magnificence. Cultivate it and he will look for more. There’s always so much more…

+9. Ease. It is in your relaxation, in the patience of yourself. Such simplicity. A draft towards what appears to be comfortable with penetration, fearless, accepting, assertive. So sensual. So intriguing. So you.

+10 Personality. All in your being, your flow, your energy. In the way you see the world, the things you experience, perceive, accept. Passion. Fire. The juice of life. Your life.

+11. Purpose. A vision, a mind, your soul, your life. A reason to live. Something to live through. What is it? How far will you go to get it?

+12. Voice. So sweet. So truthfully exposing your truth. In a way that he acknowledges. loves, understands. He now holds his understanding for you.

+13. Courage to Be Seen. From the inside. Shields and resistance, such a great way to weed out the ones who do not fit. Yet vulnerability to the one’s who are your match. Layer by layer, brick by brick the wall crumbles and soon you will find yourself knowing yourself. You begin to see who you are and others begin to worship you for it.

+14. Unconditional. Love. None expecting. A gesture of passion, compassion, of healing and caring. You expect nothing in return. Absolutely nothing. Emanating love in it’s purest form. How good it feels in your presence.

+13. Sex. The spine, one wondrous thing. It says everything. How much you love it when he penetrates you, when he caresses you, spoons you. When he kisses you. Your hips sway, your lips pouch, grow blood red. Ready to be kissed. Ah, the surrender, the shamelessness of your sex. Like a cat rubbing against him. Ecstatic. Orgasmic. Meow.

This is your surrender.

An unbearable intensity of it all. The love. The sex. The suspense and thrill and pain and so much more. The body cannot hold it all. A manifestation of an extreme to be expressed, wet, running down your thighs, running down your face. Running…

What a relief. What a catharsis through orgasm. Over and over and over again. There’s no way around feeling alive, no way around finding that orgasm, that shatters everything else into a myriad of pleasurable experiences. Nothing else matters. The hurricane unleashed is the expression of the suffering inside. Then, liberation through your tears. It feels so good to finally say what this tormenting craving is.

To find your voice, to express the longing to be taken in mind, heart, in your body and your soul. To love fiercely, with everything you have. To give fully even when it’s scary. And to be ravished so deeply that the burdens of the past begin to cease. If you allow them to be washed away by your tears, taken out of your body and onto the open. Refreshingly exhausting. And then another orgasmic wave flushing every cell of your body, gliding through your soul, leaving you with sensual emptiness, with fulfilling nothingness. The pain? It doesn’t hold it’s full force any longer.

He holds you in your woes. Just say it. Say that you want him here. To hold you, for you to feel safe, to be the natural disaster you are. With your womanly wiles, your erratic outbreaks, your unpredictability. He conquered you so you will open up to him. That is his true bliss. To see you blossom under his hands, his gaze. To feel the texture of your glowing skin in the pale moonlight. To hear the sweetness in your voice like nectar from a forbidden fruit. To smell the captivating scent of your body, your flower. His bliss – your freedom.

In bliss you find your tranquility, your peace, your ecstasy. How much joy, relief and peace to be found in a moment of burning intensity, of dancing surrender. How much healing and permission to just be.

~ Joice Joker __________________________________________________________________

Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

How To Win A Man

Let’s dive into the mystery of a man’s mind and what turns him on. How you can win his affection and have him pursue you.

° ° ° ° °

The Look. It is all in your eyes. Just one look decides if you will ever speak. Shine! Bring your essence into the world so that he can sense you a mile away. And then, when your eyes meet, nothing needs to be said. He sees a part of him in you. And you recognize a part of yourself in the mirror of his eyes.

The second look. Your gaze goes down, directed inwards. Do you want to look again? You can’t resist. The coyness in your behavior, your invitation, so sweet to him. The faint smile around the corner of your mouth says it all. The game is on.

Words. Uh, oh. Is that an onslaught of nerdiness? So brilliant! He’s in love. Speak. About the things you enjoy. About your passions. Your voice will tremble and shake. He will hear your excitement. And feel the vibration inside of you.

Challenge him.
Him laying things out for you, what  delight to see his passion. To challenge you back, to dance the dance of mind and sensuality stimulating conversation. The chase, just for a little while. You never withdraw. Only superficially. But underneath, ohh…..underneath the fire burns for his passion, doesn’t it?

Love him. Unconditionally.
Never a withdrawal of your love, not even during a fight. Feel disappointment, regret, resentment towards a situation, something he did. It’s fine. And yet you never make it personal by directing it towards him as a person. Because it’s not personal.

Compassion. Nothing beats the kindness of an empathy forged by a feminine soul. The understanding, the acceptance. Waning resistance. Mmmmm……Beautiful.

Respect. Oh yes, ma’am. Nothing like it. The tone, appealing. The attitude, a mix between admiration, love and curiosity. Who is this man? Do you want to know everything about him? No? Then it’s about time!
You might find yourself in a humble place of a learning experience, when you approach his interests as a student. Try it. It’s fun to try.

Dive into his interests.
The way your mind flows in it’s element, his reign even. A different approach to his, uniquely yours. How delightful, how deep, how educating. He just loves it when a you can let the nerdy, the naughty in you take over in at least one passion of his. Preferably his priority one. Let your juices run all over it and watch how your scent sends him into oblivion.

Support his life’s purpose.
Every man has it. A purpose he feels drawn towards, something he must do before he dies. Support him in it. Challenge him to become even better at it. To become THE master in it. So he can go out there with you by his side and say ‘This woman is my greatest inspiration’. And so you can admire him deeply as a man with a thick stream of purpose running through his entire existence.

Open up.
Show him everything. When you open up to him he will have no other choice but to fall for you. An open gate is inviting, a closed one only has a man hoping for more, yet knowing this fortress can never be claimed. While the chase in the beginning is the fine art of seduction, further stages of intrigue are created by showing more by showing a little bit more at a time. Sometimes a bit more and sometimes a lot more. Play with how much you reveal. Play with the intensity, the energy.

Be true to yourself.
The lies we live are the lies we attract. Living live’s of conformity kills our uniqueness, our individuality, our libido and the carnal fire within us. Slowly it overrides our drive to live and breathe and sing and dance. How much longer will we accept this lie to take up this huge space in our minds? It needs to pay rent or get the fuck out!
And now, with all of this new space inside of you…what will you fill it up with?

Let him be the one.
To do things for you, to rescue you. From the agony of logic and reason. So that you can be carefree. Singing, dancing, breathing, being. How pure. So protected. All because you let him. Isn’t it magical?

~ Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

Freedom within Captivity

Unseen bonds hold sway
Nearly like a tamer’s whip
The snake charmer’s flute
A magician’s wand

Hypnotised by gentleness
The soft touches, the silence
Fascinated by it’s effect
In mind I draw closer, in spirit
The sound of the flute…..well

Oh, the trap
Yet delight flushes the system
While wondering about the ropes
Which should have been sensed…
Or perhaps they were
Carelessness sweeps away any thought of worry

„I saw the freedom in your eyes
And knew at once you were mine“

Upon remembering your words
Captivity, lusciously helpless
Curious a thing
I give love to whom I may
But you stole it somehow
This ability to choose freely
My heart…
My sex…
My freedom…
Captivity is now my drug
A faithful companion through days and nights
When the tickle of surrender takes over ever so relentlessly, fierce

Fascination of the unknown led me here
An unknown taste, a different sound
The sky opens and I’ll fly
But for now I will stay a while
And prowl this new world

And then
The drive to run daggers through your chest
Into your heart, piercing your very soul
While you hold this shield, my shield
I never asked you to
I never needed you to
But you did, regardless

Realising this, my weapons clashingly hit the ground
I find myself powerless to hurt you

This obsession over blood and flesh…
It’s unbearable
Lust to violate strikes the very core
My heart too weak to resist this primal calling
Instinctively claws grow longer, sharper
A thumbing sound they make
As they cut deep into your flesh
Your chest exposed I cannot help it
I cannot help it I tried
I did
I really did


In woes of anguishing torment I leave you
Right there, at the scene of crime
The night was terrible
I thought you were dead
And I was dying
Yet I couldn’t resist coming back the next morning
Like a murderer always returns to the place of doom

When I saw you unharmed, my heart blossomed
You survived my attack, it shouted in my skull

I was fierce
Yet you broke through my resolve
That, which was protected by bloody claws
Stained red from thrashing
And all you did was let me feel
A thousand times and more

Hell disrupted my soul
Anguish left me in woes of fear and sorrow
Over the murder committed
My conviction is my conscious
The knowledge to have hurt the one I love
Guilt, unforgivable guilt
There’s only one thing left to do
To engage
In the dance of complimentary contradictions
Where you will be slayn
I will attempt the kill once more
Perhaps many times more
Before I learn that phantoms are immortal

One day, perhaps you might be the one
The one who delightfully tortures
Beyond boundaries of the mind
Beyond all that is known to me so far
We shall see…

~ Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages:

Courage to Fear

Fearless, that’s what I want to be.
To open up to him even when I’m scared out of my senses.
Sometimes I can’t. And that’s when I need him most. Like a prisoner in her own mind I wander. Like a creature of worship captured in her own temple of the doomed. Chained by shame, by expectations not even my own. It’s a maze. Many ways to get to the goal, many turns, many dead ends. But no exit.

And then he speaks. That voice again. I shutter. His words pierce my soul. It’s fucking painful. The suffering forces heavy tears out of blue eyes. Gravity pulls them down ivory features. Sobs. Faint. Almost unnoticeable. If only the earth shattering quake inside would stop.

Wrong focus. Dammit. The trembling becomes stronger. And then he notices. And he watches. With those intense eyes that breach my defenses like a laser beam. I want to die. Now.

Yes, he speaks the truth I don’t want to admit to myself. The truth that says that I lingered too much in an unacceptable behavior. I messed up and wasn’t aware of it. All of this time my own masks betrayed me, betrayed others in the process. I lied. Mainly to myself. He saw through it, knew what was going on or perhaps he didn’t, thinking I’m a compulsive liar. I destroyed trust and regret it.
And yet… isn’t this a fantastic opportunity to get up, dust off and do it again? Only the right way this time? I have to gather myself again. Realizing to have hurt him so badly makes me flinch. What if…

It doesn’t matter. Whatever comes out of this, I will make the best of it now. Because ‘now’ is all I have. ‘Now’ is my time, my moment to become who I am, who I want to be. Is it not?
I surrender into the emotion of gratitude.
It is just that I felt that I have to run. From the terror of the consequences my words might provoke. For good or bad. Guilt has a tight grip on me. “I’m sorry.” As those words seep into his ears, his mind I feel liberated from strangling myself with this truth. He looks relieved, but then again…

“You have no idea how much I have to control myself not to hurt you!”
My eyes sink to pale, entangled hands in my lap. That guilt again. But there’s something entirely different under the surface. Brewing. Churning. A yearning. For physical torment. For some kind of consequence that will stop me from doing this crazy junk. Right now I really don’t care about the verdict that might be spoken over me. And then I hear myself. “Maybe that’s what’s needed…” A shudder in the face of my exposure, the courage to state my desires. And to openly admit to the fear that comes along with it.

He nods. “Indeed!”
Faster than I can react I find myself on the bed, struggling to get away. Crap! Why did I say that? Or do I really need a good butt spanking? So absurd! I’m a grown woman! And yet…
Something inside calls it on me. ‘We do need this, as crazy as it might be. And so does he.” My persona, all four women, each shining in their own brilliance. My aspects. My quirks, my love, my genius, my perversions. Are they perversions? Or is that just a mindless definition I took on?
I don’t know. Don’t care either. All that counts is to still this hunger for pain. To feel the difference between justified rage and drunken madness. Between the consequence of love and the punishment of disconnect. To draw that line for myself to know that when something was wrong – it was painful. I label myself insane. Often times I’m wrong. Perhaps I’m right this time…

Pain. Suffering. Torture.
I love it. I fear it. In context with physical hurt when my soul’s anguish becomes too strong. So strong that I seek relieve in extreme ways of bodily torment. Blood-lust.  Even for my own life’s red juices. A diversion from the hell I feel inside. I hope it hurts badly. I hope I won’t withdraw from this. I hope he goes along with my challenging behavior.

Anxiety over being judged emerges. Over pushing him away. Awareness of the things that torture him deeply rises. The ambiguity within me in times when rationality is needed more than anything.  When my crazy fits in those moments endanger everything we have together. What if he can’t follow his path when I behave this way?

My radar spots the killer inside of him. And I love him for it. He has that look that says more than a thousand words. Demanding. Furious. Nearly out of control.
I freeze in place. How stupid it was to let myself go like this. Then I catch myself. His look changed. Good Lord. Fear strikes with devastating notion. I have to get away. Now. My limbs come back to life. Somewhat.

As I crawl away, defy him, his wrath is provoked, only to have him unleash what I feel is needed. Through all of the angst of his verdict I feel that this must be done. Maximum sentence: A severe butt whooping. The streaks on my behind scream, red and hot. My cries don’t matter. Not this time. Or maybe they do. At this point his wrath takes over. Not to seriously harm me. Yet enough to inflict a biting sentence. Maybe the stabbing pinch, the crouching tickle of emerging healing, will teach me a lesson, the tears, the sobs, the cringe, every time his hand touches my delicate skin. Right where it throbs profusely under the executed verdict.

And then.
Kisses. Murmurs into my ear. Words of pleasure. Of comfort. Of discomfort. The certainty of uncertainty takes over. I lay in his arms, fully spooned, liberated from whatever drove me into urges of disconnect from myself and him. As he wraps himself around me I feel safe. An odd thing to feel after what just happened. But he understands the craziness I went through. He gave what I required. And I got all of it. So now what? My nose is clogged, for one. And apart from that…. another shield is broken.
What might happen if I don’t care to repair it…

~ Joice Joker


Joice and her partner David Esotica work with women to create the ecstatic intimacy in a relationship they crave. They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.

Check out their Facebook pages: